Half year battle, half day moved on

Writing this om 17th July 2016.

Looking back at my life. Looking back at my age.

One of these days, or exactly 3 days ago, I spend most of the days sleeping or just wondering my thoughts. What am I doing right now? Am I doing the right thing?

Am I a good person? Am I doing the best that I should? Why I'm feeling lonely? Why I can't just say what I want? 

Why I need to pretend?

And I guess the same questions coming back to me again. Am I doing the right thing?

I wish someone can let me know. I wish I know how to live my life

I wish I know all the answers.

Like they said. Find a mentor. 

Of course, I've been thinking it so much. And the same questions come back to me. Am I doing rhe right thing?

Lonely. And they say talk to Allah. I know. And I know I'm not the best muslims out there. And I'm still trying. And the same questions come back to me. Why me? Why cant you just show me the way. What I'm supposed to do in my life right now?

I'm writing this post not because I want to admit my defeat. Or tired. I guess this was a phasing on time that I have. 

A lot of time I wonder. What I'm doing or whether it is a right thing to do. Most of the time I need to pretend to be happy, to be motivated and to be strong. And people expect you to. And I expect myself to be better.

I'm not sure if I can be 'better' to some person. But I do know I'm trying to be a better person to me. And so, dear Munirah. Please be happy. Please hang on..everything will be allright. Please be patient. Please let it go. Please be stronger. Please, I hope in year future when you read this whole thing, just realised you just finish one of the chapter of your own. 

#bestrong #behappy. And to everyone who struggle out there, #bestrong and #behappy too. 

Life will be better..

Xox ;)) ;))) ;)))

munirahkhadri